Let the Games Begin

Several years ago, my place in the world crystallized for me. I'd walked into a novelty/gift store with a friend and found a display of postcards from Co-Edikit. One of them called out to me:


I'm not kidding. It was like angels singing from on high. This was absolutely what was wrong with me! I was the embodiment of flypaper for freaks. I bought the postcard, placed it in the corner of my mirror, read it every day with a knowing smile on my face, and continued to experience the phenomenon that is being flypaper for freaks. No joke.

(Note that this particular postcard - the one that has followed me across the country and back, even as I've rid myself of belongings with each move - is no longer available. It appears a t-shirt and a magnetic notepad are the only items deemed worthy of sale any longer. And they don't even have the same character on them!)

In any case, this freak magnet thing I have going on works with all people, but it's really only the men I'm concerned about here. Yup. I attract some of the freakiest men on the planet. At least, I used to. And then I started finding ways to avoid attracting men altogether. On purpose. I was so tired of the freaks that none seemed better than the clear option. Well, it was that and the fact that I couldn't seem to make myself stop vacillating between two decidedly not freaky (but certainly not perfect) men. It slowed down but didn't stop; the freaks have always found me.

And, ssssshhh -- don't tell anyone, but I think I kind of like it. The stories I can tell about these men are AMAZING! Seriously. The thing is, it's slowed down enough that I'm getting a little bored. I recycled all the stories over and over. I need some new material.

Thus, the birth of the Grand Experiment. And I'm inviting you along for the ride. Come join me - I promise it'll be fun ... and all you have to do is sit back, relax, and enjoy. I get stuck doing all the work!

The Goal: Gain new material for my stash of freak stories
The Methodology: Post a personals ad on Craigslist, following a few simple rules
The Hypothesis: Freaks are out there, and they're ready to pounce ... I just need to offer "permission" again.

Wondering about the simple rules? I have 4:
1) Any ad I post must be honest, a true-to-myself description. In fact, it should be an ad that I would post if I was actually trying to meet a man I'd like to date, develop a relationship with, and eventually marry. That is, it should be a serious ad. No lies. No fibs. No truth-stretching.
2) I must respond to any man who answers my ad.
3) I must continue to respond. In the e-mail stage, I must be the last person to send an e-mail - I must leave no man hanging.
4) When (if?) they ask to meet, I must say yes. In a public place. Far away from my home. And telling someone where I am and who I believe I will be with at all times. Safety first, sure. But I must say yes. (This is sort of like the rule my parents gave us before we went to our first 8th grade dance - "you must say yes when a boy asks you to dance. No exceptions." Additionally, if it seems that the online communication is dragging on and on, I must make the "ask" myself.

Of course, I'm thinking you may need some proof that I have a long history of being flypaper for freaks. So, we'll warm up with a few of the "oldies but goodies." Come along, join the fun, invite your friends.